Monday, August 16, 2021

Not Every Woman Has the Same Body...And That's Okay

NOT EVERY WOMAN HAS THE SAME BODY...AND THAT’S OKAY ❤️

The other day, my husband dropped some serious knowledge about my body that totally changed my perspective on things. But more on that later. First let me tell you what happened. 


I just bought a gorgeous red dress. I bought it after seeing one of my friends post pictures of herself wearing it on Facebook. She looked so beautiful in it. 


I ordered it online and was so excited for it to be delivered. I’d already imagined myself in it and I couldn’t wait to wear it on a date with my husband. 


The dress arrived, and to my disappointment, it was too big. So I ordered it again in the next smallest size.


While I waited for the dress to arrive, I again imagined myself in it. In fact, while I was waiting for it to arrive, another one of my FB friends posted pictures of herself in this dress too. She also looked gorgeous in it. I couldn’t wait for mine to arrive.


So the dress got here and I tried it on...and...it was too small. It fit everywhere except for across the top where it was just a little bit too tight. 


So the first dress was too big, and the next size was too small. 


I was devastated!


Now back to my husband…


I was telling him about how upset I was that the dress didn’t fit my body like it fit my friends’ bodies. I even pulled up my friends’ pictures on Facebook to show him to further drive home my point. I told him, “See! Look at how good they look in this dress. They look so beautiful. Why can’t the dress look that good on me?”


As I was feeling sorry for myself, my husband looked at me and said, “Trina, they have a different body type than you. Not every dress looks the same on every body type. There’s nothing wrong with that. Just go buy a dress that’s made for your body type.”


He said it just like that. No drama. No judgement. He just spoke facts. 


And he totally made me feel better.❤️ 


The thing is, he’s so right. We don’t all have the same body type, and that’s ok. Every dress doesn’t look the same on all of us, and that’s ok too.


Why do we beat ourselves up when something fits a model or our friends differently than it fits us? 


It’s because that’s what we’ve been conditioned by society and the media to do. Before my husband corrected my thinking, I was being drawn into that internal spiral of feeling like my body wasn’t good enough.


But thankfully, my husband snapped me out of it and brought me back to reality. 


The truth is, MY BODY DOESN’T NEED TO CHANGE TO FIT INTO CLOTHES I LIKE. Instead, I CAN CHOOSE TO SPEND MONEY ON CLOTHES THAT FIT MY BODY...EXACTLY AS IT IS NOW. 


It’s that simple. I still think the red dress I bought is a gorgeous dress. And one day, my body may change such that it fits me beautifully. But today isn’t that day and that’s ok.


So I’m returning both dresses, and I’m buying another dress that fits and flatters my body...exactly as my body is right now. 


Thanks, husband, for the reality check!


P.S. - If you're a woman who wants to learn more about self-love and body acceptance, sign up for my newsletter. It's filled with so much good info. I can't wait to share it with you! Sign up here



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Joyful Movement: what it is & how it differs from traditional exercise

 HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF JOYFUL MOVEMENT?🤸🏽‍♂️⛹🏼‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️

I admit, the first time I heard that terminology I rolled my eyes. I felt like it was a term they were using to try to trick me into exercising.

If I’m being honest, throughout most of my relationship with exercise over the years, I haven’t particularly enjoyed it. 😳

I always thought of exercise as something I had to do to burn off the calories from what I just ate. Or something I had to do preemptively in advance of going out to eat.

Even when I tried to focus on the health benefits of exercise, it still felt like another rule of something I had to do to be good.

If you feel the same way about exercise, I get it. I completely understand where you’re coming from.

Then, I heard about joyful movement.

Joyful movement is a way to approach exercise where you focus on pleasure. If something isn’t pleasurable, you don’t focus on that.

Thinking about exercise as a way to atone for the calories you have just eaten is not pleasurable.

Thinking about exercise as a way to give yourself permission to eat later today is also not pleasurable.

Thinking about exercise as something you have to do just to check a box isn’t pleasurable either.

Now I get it, we can’t only do things in life that are pleasurable.

👉🏾 But if there’s a way to make something more fun, why not?

That’s what thinking about exercise more as “joyful movement” has done for me.

Let me give you an example. This morning I woke up and I was debating whether I wanted to stay in bed or get up and go for a walk.

As I was trying to make my decision, my thoughts had nothing to do with my weight or the calories I would burn by walking.

I simply thought about the pleasure walking would bring me.❤️

I thought about how I love to smell the fresh air in the morning. I love hearing the birds and seeing rabbits in my neighbors’ yards.

I thought about how I love having that time to myself without any other distractions. I thought about the music I love to listen to when I’m walking or the podcasts I love to catch up on.

All of those things bring me joy. So when I focused on the joy that walking brings me, it became a no brainer.

I got out of bed, got dressed, and went for a walk.💪🏾

Now, I’ve had people tell me that walking is a waste of my time and that instead I need to do something that burns more calories like orange theory.

Here’s the thing, though. I used to do orange theory and I think it’s an amazing program. I totally get why people love it. But it brought me absolutely no joy. It did bring me a couple of injuries, but it did not bring me joy.

That’s what joyful movement is about. Rejecting other peoples’ ideas of the type of exercise you “should” be doing, and listening to yourself and figuring out what type of exercise brings you joy.

P.S. - If you're a woman who wants to learn more about self-love and body acceptance, sign up for my newsletter. It's filled with so much good info. I can't wait to share it with you! Sign up here


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